I love you to the moon and back

To my dearest daughter, I love you to the moon and back.

You are growing up in a crazy world and although I worry for you, I am excited to see how you put your personal stamp on it. There are things you are going to learn through the years my child.. Life isn’t fair, please read that again. You will be let down, you will get your heart-broken, you will get passed over for a job, you will get fired, you will get flat tires, you will be treated unfairly and it’s okay. The sooner you learn that this life doesn’t owe you anything, the happier you will be. 

As a parent I can teach you how to tie your shoes, how to swim, ride a bike, read and write but somethings you will just have to experience and navigate on your own, but I want to give you a few important lessons you must always carry with you. 

  1. You are perfectly imperfect, and that is perfect for me.

  2. Always eat dessert, Life is too short to pass it up. 

  3. Kindness goes along way. Sometimes it is easier to fit in with a crowd or not stand up for what’s right but it will not be easier on your soul, and that missed opportunity to be kind will stay with you forever. 

  4. Learn something new everyday. Your physical beauty will get you far but man o man there is nothing more beautiful than an intelligent brain. Push yourself to learn about other cultures, languages, subjects, politics. Always feed your brain

  5. Never feel bad for sticking up and speaking out for what’s right. It’s not who stands with you in the sun that matters but who sits with you in the dark that’s important. Your voice is powerful, so use it and use it wisely.

  6. Apologize…. There is nothing more humbling than admitting when you were wrong, but you will be respected for it. 

  7. Take chances, Tomorrow my love is not promised and you do not want to be surrounded with regret of all the adventures you wished you did and the words you wished you said. You might fail, but at least you tried.  

The most important thing to remember is that I am prouder to be your mom today than I was yesterday, and when I wake up tomorrow I will be the proudest mom in the world. I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders so that you do not have to. I will pick you up when you fall, I will push you when you pause, I will be your number one cheerleader, your worst critic, your biggest pain in the bum, your best hugger. We as parents sometimes assume that our kids know we are proud of them and that we love them but don’t always express it. This is my open letter to you… You were the greatest accomplishment of my life. When you smile, I smile. When you are sad, my heart is broken. When you feel accomplished, I am braggadocio. When you are scared, I am brave. You are perfectly imperfect and that is perfect to me. 

I love you to the moon and back MJF. You are meant for greatness, and I can’t wait to see how you change the world.

Times Up

To the current administration, here are my questions to you. At what point when it comes to women’s issues did you all decide this should be led by a man? I know when I woke up today it was 2018, where women not only have the right to vote, go to school, get a job, serve in the military but they have gone to the moon, flown around the world, found cures for diseases, and served in the government. 

This isn’t Mad Men or is it? I truly wonder the hypocrisy that takes place at your dinner tables when you tell your daughters to study hard, dream big and you can become anything you set your sights on. All while putting up roadblocks everywhere to ensure they know they are the lesser sex. 

I can feed a child from my body, can you? I can give life, can you? I have more bones in my body, a higher pain tolerance, longer life expectancy, ability to multi-task, show compassion, endure struggle than a man. So why today do you continue to choose men to work on women’s issues?  It seems to me that you’d be better off letting me worry about both our issues seeing the past 200 years hasn’t been great in the hands of men. 

Stop celebrating Women’s Day or holding your wife’s hands knowing full well you hold them in very little regard. As Susan B Anthony proudly said ” I declare to you that woman must not depend on the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself”. 

Your time is UP! Women demand equal pay for equal work, women demand better healthcare, women demand the respect we deserve for being the silent leaders for so long, women demand to be heard. 

This is where I take my stand, this is my open letter to you. One angry fed up bad ass woman. 


Make us a priority again.


I wake up everyday frustrated and I go to bed feeling defeated with the current administration. The chaos and division they are creating can drive anyone crazy so what is the Democratic parties mission and when are they going to all get on the same page and make us a priority again? I asked what some top issues were earlier this year in the hopes to find out how to unite a party that means well, is great at policy making but fails at the message and executing it. Healthcare, education, climate change were the top 3 issues that were repeated over and over. The interesting thing is these issues all intertwine and have a rippling effect on each other. I do not believe we need to be told what the issues are but we need to know how the party is going to come up with plausible solutions.

Education; No child left behind is the greatest American scheme ever. Our children are being taught how to be test takers but not learning. We have some how put the importance of education on the back burner but wonder why economic growth is stagnate, wages are low, crime is high, health issues are on the rise and why this country can not get out of debt. If we want to make the country a priority we need to start with education. Schools are falling apart, classrooms are over crowded, teachers are under paid, parents aren’t as involved and our children are being left behind. We are failing our children by not improving every aspect of education. The future is STEM but most schools are lacking in technology, science labs and basic understanding of math and science. Funding for schools has not only come to a full stop it’s being gutted left and right. Our kids no longer have art, music, physical ed and schools are only funded if their MCAS scores meet certain standards. Lower income neighborhoods, rural areas are always coming up short in scores and thus in funding. This cycle of disappointment needs to end. Standardize testing needs to end. Spending 3 months teaching kids how to test is wasting 3 months of learning new amazing new things. Our children’s brains are sponges and will absorb what we throw at them so why aren’t we filling them to the brim? Foreign languages need to be taught in grade school, computers need to be taught in grade school, political science, civics, physics, art, music are needed in this day in age. There is direct correlation with education and economic growth. So why isn’t this a priority? Teachers are over worked and under paid but are responsible in molding our future. 7,000 students drop out of a school a day and a high school drop out will earn 200,000 less than a high school graduate in their life time. 75% of crimes are committed by high school drop-outs. $1.48 trillion is the total of student debt in this country. 44.2 million Americans have student loan debt. We can not become a better country, improve the economy, lower crime if we do not invest in our children and their education. We can not improve this countries poor health if we do not invest in our education. If we are not teaching all aspects of science and STEM we can not improve this countries environmental issues. The U.S. military budget for 2018 is $824.6 billion dollars. If we invested that kind of money in education we could wipe out student debt, pay teachers higher wages, open more schools, invest in STEM, acknowledge gifted children and create programs where they could shine. With lower classroom numbers teachers could give students more 1 on 1 attention which would decrease drop out rates. Providing expanded access to high quality education will not only expand economic opportunity for residents, but overall state economy that anything else a state government can do. States can increase the strength of their economies and their ability to grow high-wage employers by investing in education and increasing the number of well-educated workers. Investing in education is good for states budgets in the long run, since workers with higher incomes contribute more through taxes over the course of their lifetime. Research shows that the greater the parents education correlates positively with children’s health, cognitive abilities, and academic achievement. (Wolfe and Zuvekas 1995)  So I ask why are we not making this a priority?

If we start with education we can work on healthcare. If we improve our state’s economies we can invest more in overall healthcare. Medicaid expansion is a must, Medicare negotiating drug pricing is a must, stopping for-profit healthcare is a must. Cost of insurance and healthcare has been increasing every year since the 1960’s but there are very simple ways to make premiums affordable, quality healthcare accessible. Administration costs are higher than ever, executive management salaries are in the multi-millions, shareholders are controlling pharmaceutical companies making profit more important than research and people’s lives. Lobbyist are paying off politicians and buying their votes which increases hard-working American’s healthcare cost. Although Universal healthcare and/or Medicare for all sounds great I don’t believable its obtainable in this lifetime so we need to focus on the smaller issues that could have a huge impact on lowering cost while improving this countries health.

Congress needs to overturn their legislation that doesn’t allow Medicare to negotiate drug prices. In doing this drug cost will decrease. Price gauging needs to be deemed illegal. When pharmaceutical companies focus more on making a profit for their shareholders instead of making their medications affordable and accessible for their customers it not only increases premiums but is dangerous to those who can not afford their life saving prescriptions. When big pharma knows they can price their medications at any cost it only opens them up to fraud and waste which increases premiums.  When CEO’s of healthcare companies are making $30-60 million dollars a year as their salary premiums naturally increase. We need to decrease administration costs. We need to have Medicaid expansion in every state. In doing this hospitals, clinics are being reimbursed for services rendered and not being burdened with free care and the uninsured which forces them to either raise their rates or shut down leaving people without accessible care. When states have Medicaid children are being properly treated and statistics show are healthier and go to school regularly. When states expand Medicaid more people can afford their medications without worrying about other important bills. When states expand Medicaid more seniors can afford nursing homes. When states expand Medicaid mental health services and addiction resources become available. If we focus on making healthcare a priority millions will have frequent check ups and be able to be pro active about their well-being and have the ability to catch a disease that is easily treatable rather than waiting until it’s too late. If we continue to allow lobbyist to pay off politicians American’s well being will be on the back burner as these same politicians enjoy the best health insurance at the lowest cost on the tax payers dime. If we invest in healthcare, American’s will lead a healthier lifestyle which will only help with the countries environmental issues. If we acknowledge that Medicare is not an entitlement program but something we pay into since our very first job. If we acknowledge the only issue with Medicare is Medicare A we can focus with coming up with a solution instead of gutting the rest of it which is thriving. Interstate insurance not only does not work but will increase costs, is not regulated and gives companies the ability to cherry pick only healthy customers while leaving the sicker in high risk pools which most people can not afford. (donaldtrumpnewstoday.com)

Climate change is real, global warming is real, coal is not the future. I think we can all agree that we love fresh air, swimming in clean water, walking in parks, fields, forests and enjoy seeing wild life in their natural habitats. Clean air, water and energy is the way of the future not only in ensuring we have a future but in job creation. When we have a cleaner enviroment we tend to be healthier. CO2, methane gas leads to an increase in asthma. Increase in mercury leads to lower weights, developmental issues including retardation in newborns. If we do not take care of eco-system we are not making us a priority.  We can only learn how to do this, find solutions and develop cleaner and more efficient ways to combat global warming and climate change if we make education a priority. Science is a must.

The Democratic party needs to make their unified message a priority, the Democratic party needs to make our issues a priority, the democratic party needs to make their talking points a priority. The Democratic party needs to make US a priority in order to become the majority again and stop the destruction that Trump and the Republican party are creating.

MeToo Bubble

In the new era of many are being forced out of . Every day on the news we hear about another famous, powerful person being accused of sexual misconduct. The media is spending hours upon hours a day covering the politicians, the news anchors, the media moguls and the accuser’s stories. While the Silence Breaker’s movement is, powerful and can make real positive changes it also can have a negative impact and is being covered in a very irresponsible way. At the age of 35 I am now being forced to face my rape that took place when I was 14 because I was living in the “not me” bubble. At the age of 14 growing up in a conservative family, upscale neighborhood, attending a private catholic school reporting sexual assault was never an option. The question of what will people think of me, will people believe me, did I say no, will the neighbors still talk to my parents, will my parents still love me? So, at the age of 14 not mature enough to process anything that happened physically, mentally emotionally I made the decision to lock it away. Never to speak of it again. What isn’t discussed are the side effects of the “not me” bubble. I panic going into confined places, I flinch if a stranger touches me, I still to this day look to see if I will see his face in the crowd, I can’t listen to the song that was blasting during the assault so no one would hear me. For years’ friends and family would question me about these quirks of mine and the bubble would push the words I was raped deep down. With the phenomenon the question of why did they wait so long? Why now? But the media instead of having rape counselors, survivors, psychiatrists on their shows to answer these questions, are replying with opinions and “I don’t know”. If we are going to have this conversation and make serious changes, we have the responsibility to answer these questions with experts and facts so that the 14-year-old me isn’t worrying about not being believed. If we want to break the silence, we need to educate those on why they stayed silent for so long. If we are going to talk about sexual violence on TV all day everyday it irresponsible not to promote support and resources for those of us whose “not me” bubble is being popped into the reality of . To all you “not me”, I see you, I hear you, I believe you, I stand with you, I speak for you.

What did you want to be when you grow up?

What do you want to be when you grow up? This question was asked several times when you were a child.. So many kids wanted to be an astronaut, a firefighter, basketball player, singer. I myself wanted to be a doctor dancer, yes I was an overachiever trying to tackle two professions in one.

When we finally did grow up many of us did not become what our younger selves wished we had. But when we look back and reflect on what we did want to be no one will recall wanting to be homeless, panhandling, strung out, addicted and hitting rock bottom. These things would never cross anyone’s mind on something to aspire to and when I got a little older I wondered why would anyone let their life get that bad, how did they get there, why is no one helping them, until my friends started dying and it all started to make sense.

I am a 35 year old white female that grew up in a well to do family and went to a private catholic school high school and went on to college. My friends all went to private schools and all came from good loving families. They were involved in school, sports, the community. They had friends, jobs, a healthy social life. So why am I going to more wakes than weddings? If I want a high school reunion I go to a funeral and I see everyone I ever went to school with. I’ve watched so many of my friend’s mothers who used to drive me home from school, have to be carried down a church aisle because they physically can not walk due to heart ache. This, I am certain is not what my friends saw their life when they were 7. 

Our society has this idea that addiction only affects a race, a class, a sex and or a culture and because of that we have ignored or been in denial that it does not discriminate. We grew up with a ” Just Say No” mentality instead of ” ask me anything” Addiction has become a dirty word that no one wants to admit, It wont happen to me, it can’t happen to me, but 64,000 people died last year because it did happen to them. Someone didn’t go from a joint today to a needle of heroin tomorrow there’s a story in between. Some of my friends were involved in accidents and got hooked on the pain meds they were prescribed and couldn’t stop and when the doctors stopped writing prescriptions they had to go elsewhere. Others used drugs recreationally and once a weekend turned into several times a day. But what a lot of people don’t ever want to admit and talk about what I saw some of my friends deal with and die from is mental health issues and poor mental health access, therapy, treatment. Meds are expensive, co pays are expensive, admitting you don’t feel right isn’t easy, finding the right treatment takes awhile and for many turn to drugs to quiet the noise in their heads. My friends didn’t want to die, my friends never thought they would overdose, my friends needed to get high 1 more time…. 

We are failing my friends in this society on so many levels. Access to mental health is almost 3rd world country. On average to see a new therapist/psychiatrist wait list is 6-8 weeks and if you’re feeling unsteady that is 8 weeks too long. If you go to an ER you’re left in a hallway alone for hours and treated like a criminal. Therapists see patients every 10 minutes and just write prescriptions without getting to the root cause. Addiction will never be cured unless we get to the root cause on why the person started using in the first place. Out patient rehabs need both mandatory 1 on 1 therapy and group therapy. If you had to receive narcan because you overdosed we need to start mandatory holding people 72 hours instead of just giving them narcan and letting them walk away. If we continue to let Big pharma lobbyist run the show 64,000 people dying last year will be doubled next year. We can’t solve this problem 100% but we can certainly make a huge dent and save some lives without having 18 committees, 10 months of meetings and only allotting $15 million dollars to the opioid crisis. Stop telling kids to just say no, this has never worked not ever. Let’s tell males they do not look cooler when they are drunk and high, lets tell girls they will not impress a guy if she gets high with him. Lets make mental health issues something that is openly spoken about, and accessible like CVS on every other block. My friends are dying not because they didn’t know drugs were bad, came from bad families but because we learned just say NO but didn’t realize why until 1 more high was the last high. My friends are dying because they lost their way and couldn’t access the proper meds. My friends are dying because big pharma cares more about profit than about my best friends mom who sleeps with her sons dirty clothes so she can still smell his scent. My friends are dying because instead of putting together a committee of substance abuse counselors, former addicts, psychiatrist the White house is having Kellyanne Conway run the Opioid Crisis. 

When I grow up, I hoped 15 of my friends  were going to grow up with me….


At a loss for Devos

Dear Bush-League 2017,
This is to replace the dear colleague letter.
In this country thousands of women have paved the way for the next generation. From education, voting, jobs, marriage, reproductive rights, combat the list goes on and on. Every generation owes a huge thank you to the last to be able to have a louder voice and respected as a powerful intellect not as a sandwich maker. We’ve learned that you can be a mom, CEO, respected leaders in communities at the same time or take your own path. We saw a female go to the moon and get nominated as president as the United States of America. One of the fundamentals we have been fighting for was education and the importance of it. From pre-k to Phd, school is where you go to learn, grow, find your way, it’s a safe haven.
I’m perplexed with the past few months. Some people in power do not have their priorities in check. We have under performing schools, under paid teachers, under funded school districts. Add these together and that makes it hard to take this counties education system to the next level. Common sense would laser focus on these issues to improve. which would produce a snowball of positivity, but….. A woman was nominated as Secretary of Education. She has no background in this field except for writing checks for fundraisers. Does not believe in public schools, civil laws, protecting the disabled, minorities and the LGBTQ community. So if you can survive that discrimination, there’s one more thing, protection and victim advocacy for sexual assaults at schools. Yes it’s still 2017 we didn’t go back in time you are reading this correctly.
This part is just for you Mrs. Devos.
After being violated, not enough soap washes away the shame, not enough beers makes you permanently forget, sleepless nights won’t make you figure out what you did wrong. It takes courageous strength to come forward. After you come forward you’re humiliated again for hours during a SANE example, shamed for coming forward, doubted for the accusations but you continue on because like the women before us we know our rights, that our voice is to be heard. In between this you’re sick from the medications, missed classes, days off from work, relationships have distanced, burdened with flashbacks, looking over your shoulder, overhearing the whispers you hopefully keep going. You are trying to unpaved the road many have laid down. You are silencing the victims while giving a voice to the predators. 98-2, these are important figures. While 98% of rape allegations are true only 2% are false. You have chosen to side with the 2%. Your actions will lead to more assaults to go unreported and send a message to rapists on campus’s that they are protected and respected. The amount of harm that your actions will cause are just as bad as the actual assault.
Please go back to private life, tea time, high society, praying the gay away and whatever bigotry acts you perform in your uber right conservative life.
I’d wish you well, but that wouldn’t be the truth.
Fearless Female

What now?

Hello, is this thing on? 

What is going on in this country, how did it we get here? 6 months ago Americans voted in the next new president. He was refreshing, an outsider never involved in politics and had his own money so wouldn’t have to owe any favors in Washington. Crowds gathered and people cheered for this man. I listened closely to his words, to his supporters to find out why is this man so popular. I try to speak to supporters and those who voted for him to genuinely find out what does he stand for, what is the appeal and what drew you in but I haven’t found anything concrete. He isn’t the opponent, he says what ever is on his mind at that second, he was a reality star and wants to make America great again… Here is the problem what was wrong with America before? Jobs were at a record high, unemployment a record low, housing was surging, marriage equality was passed, schools were getting funding for STEM, uninsured were at the lowest the county has ever seen. We listened to messages of hope, progress and determination. So what am I missing? I get called a snowflake, libtard, socialist, out of touch with reality for being passionate, informative and curious. I wonder if some or all of these supporters look outside the box, research topics to form their own opinion or if the president said it, that’s the truth. For months I watch/witness the hatred, ignorance and downright frightening events occurring. The head of the EPA is opposed to the department, against clean air, water, global warming denier, and fought to allow coal sludge to be dumped into fresh water streams. The head of Education is against public schools, fairness and equality act. Believes that discrimination is ok because as a parent you can always put your child in a different school. Instead of progressive policies, better funding for education we should just allow Jesus in and pray. The attorney general of the United States has for 30 plus years allowed for racial discrimination, bigotry towards gays. I wonder do supporters realize that every head of these departments believe the opposite of what needs to be achieved? I get accused of being too emotional over politics and when I ask questions, the response is well Clinton this, Obama that. This tells me a couple of things, you really have no idea why you are supporting this man and you have never bothered to look up any accusation Trump has thrown out, not a one! I wonder if all the men who have wives, daughters, sisters understand the importance of STEM of females, planned parenthood and wage equality. I have so many questions that 140 characters would never help. I wonder when admin figures stand up on a stool and tell me what tax payers don’t want to pay for have they ever actually asked someone else. I’m a tax payer and I wasn’t asked, but I will tell you somethings I don’t mind funding. I don’t mind funding PBS because learning is so fundamental, Art programs going to museums and libraries only enrich culture, meals on wheels because we live in a 1st world nation and no one should ever be hungry, after-school programs helps working parents, keeps kids off the streets and  you just keep learning, healthcare if I can give back to what helped me to someone deserving. If we can not be progressive thinkers and act on them then what now? If politicians complain that people shouldn’t depend on the government what are they doing to help people off? When you take away education, funding, food and healthcare you are only creating a larger number of dependents but fail to realize that pointing your finger and reminding them they are the lesser is actually your fault. We have let feelings become facts when the reality is feelings are feelings and truths, evidence are facts. I wonder how did we get here and allow a man who is so full of hate, falsehoods and an ideology that will make american no longer great to run our country. I wonder why no one holds him accountable for his words, actions and lies. I wonder what in the grand scheme of things is the bigger picture? Will this reality star experiment have consequences for generations to come? WE as a country need to take a step back for a minute and say how do WE stop this and fix it. I don’t fault you Donald Trump for having a lot of money, I don’t fault you for speaking your mind, I don’t fault you for being power-hungry. I do fault you for never giving back, for not weighing the consequences of your words but most importantly I fault you for not realizing you’re actually not in power at all. So I wonder how your supporters feel about this, and where do we go from here?

Air Mask

What happened to “America First”?

Everyday a new scandal erupts, 7am tweet, insults thrown but whatever happened to The America First promise? With so much chaos occurring, we the people have not been able to focus on the important matters that are being proposed, passed and promised.

For the longest time whenever I was on a flight I never understood why the flight attendants would instruct you to put on your air mask before helping the person next to you and or your own children. If you are not safe and secure how would you be able to help others? It makes sense, so why isn’t the American government putting on their air masks?  In order to thrive, be the best, profit we need to empower the people that collectively can help obtain these measures. First things first education, why would you ever cut funding to anything educational? Public schools, STEM, grants, scholarships, after-school care, teacher’s salaries should be this countries number one priority. When you offer kids top notch educational programs where they can learn and love to learn you are only strengthen thing country. Trades, technology, science, healthcare only become stronger when you have educated minds driving the success. When we cut funding we are allowing the cycle of poverty to continue. Less educated means fewer job opportunities which increase dependency on the government for assistance which in turn decreases funding for programs that would enrich the country. It also sends a message that “we” as a nation do not believe in the future, “we” do not really want to succeed, but to complain on how hard life is without offering a solution. $10.6 billion dollars was cut from education, what happened to America first?

As any employer knows, if you treat your employees good they will go above and beyond. When you have healthy employees they will go above and beyond so why is it so hard to offer great healthcare? $800 billion will be cut from Medicaid, $192 billion from SNAP, $5.8 billion from National Health Institute, $1.2 billion cut from FDA and $1.2 billion cut from CDC.  With all these budget cuts “we” mine as well throw the air mask out the window. That isn’t America first and I am not exactly sure what it is.  Access to vaccines, proper nutrional programs for schools, elderly and low poverty decreases health issues. Money that allows researchers to cure diseases, produce life saving medications and devices decreases American health issues. When we cut funding from the disabled, senior citizens, veterans, children we are sending a clear message that America First is a sham.

It is time to put the air masks back on, it is time to make America first in education, health care, research, technology but we cannot do that if every time we try to advance are cut off at the knee caps. There is no justification on why arts, science, environmental protections need to be defunded as Senators get paid $197,000 yearly, pay $611 annually for Federal Health Benefits, are given $944,671 for an allowance for travel, office supplies, and furniture with an additional $40,000 allowance for their state offices. Imagine how powerful of a country we would be if we actually put Americans first. So what happened?


Summer camp!!!! What kid didn’t love going to summer camp? Day camp, overnight camp, travel camp, pure awesome sauce. Ever go to Jesus camp? No, no takers! Well guess what kids? I did! Every year all summer long, overnight Jesus camp. Nothing is more exciting to a kid than roasting marshmallows over a fire singing Kumbaya. You would think with all the time spent at Jesus camp that tap-tap wouldn’t occur. Well you guessed wrong. 
When you’re a kid at sleepover camp, one of the great things you get are care packages. Care packages arrive from your family with treats and cards just letting you know they miss you and hope you’re having fun. When I was little and you saw everyone in your cabin receiving their care packages. We would sit around sharing the candy or chips. Some parents would send the best stuff. This was also a good ice breaker to make friends. Tap-tap happened to me while attending Jesus camp. I got a care package from my parents and I was sooooo excited some normal food to eat. Kids were gathered around to see what was in my box and there it was, I will never forget it a six pack of raisins. RAISINS!!!! Who the hell sends their kids raisins? Bad enough while my friends from the neighborhood and school were at six flags or swimming down on Cape Cod and I had to say ” Oh I am going to spend my summer with God” but raisins. At this very moment I knew God really hated me. Not 1 kid in the cabin wants to trade with me and they all looked at me like a weirdo. 

So if I can offer any advice to parents don’t pack raisins in a care package and send them to your kids, you are only ensuring they become the laughing stock of camp.

You’re welcome and don’t forget to make good decisions.


Work Etiquette

Etiquette……… What a word! Now I am certainly not an expert on this and will not be invited to have high tea with Queen Elizabeth anytime soon but I know the basics. I should also warn you that I am not very ” lady like” my mom can attest to this but I know how to fake it when needed ( don’t we all ladies?)

Work Etiquette is kind of important. You are stuck with a group of people you can’t stand for 40 hours a week and try to do anything to find inner peace to avoid throwing a stapler at your coworkers head. Per usual I get my ultimate tap-tap dosage when I sit at my desk. (Insert angry fist now)

Soup… enough I am stuck with a woman obsessed with having soup at lunch everyday. You might think what’s wrong with soup? I will tell you god damn it. SLUUUURRRRPPPPP if you do not know how to eat like a normal human being, soup isn’t for you. Literally slurps her soup at every spoonful. Did I tell you she has soup EVERYDAY? If that is not enough we are starting allergy season. Hey you know what is not good work place etiquette? Taking out your nasal spray at your desk and using your snot stick multiple times a day… So we are now at SLUUURRRP and Snots. TAP TAP. I eye my stapler. Hey if you have a touch of pneumonia you know what your co workers want to hear? You coughing up a lung, choking on it, hacking up phlegm and spitting it in a tissue!!! Yeah because that is awesome. So SLURRRPPP, Snots and Spit….. Hand on stapler. My favorite (sarcasms is heavy) Just because you have headphones in doesn’t mean everyone around you does as well. This means I can still hear what YOU are doing. When you need to fart maybe walk away, make loud noises so others can’t hear you something. But I have the great honor of sitting in front of someone who puts their headphones in, rips ass like he is at home on his couch in his Sunday best sweatpants almost shitting himself. If you’re tallying this up we now are at slurp, snots, spit and shit. Eyeing pictures of my family as my hand is on the stapler reminding me I can’t afford to lose my job, and no one is going to bail me out of jail! TAP TAP. So on the days God really hates me all 4 co workers in sync make these disgusting noises. ” OBAMA” angry fist in the air.. Why God why? Listen you do not have to be the author of Dear Abby to figure out this is not proper work etiquette, nor is it lady like. So knock it off.

You’re welcome

Don’t forget make good decisions.